The Worst Types of People

The Worst Types of People

A Blog by The Deizzle

This blog isn't going to be about "Who is worse... murderers or terrorists?", it's more about people that you'll most likely run into on a daily basis (if you don’t stay in a box all day and develop a hunchback). Murderers and terrorists are bad, but how often do you run into one? And if you do run into one, they'll actually be running into you, and it will probably be a one time occurrence.

I'm going to throw out some stereotypes, and then I'm going to give my very not humble opinion about it.

People with anger problems - There is never a need to get angry within the context of everyday life. Maybe if something tragic happens, or you lose a bet, or you hate someone, but beside that there is no need. These people typically drink enough caffeine to kill a horse, and going to the gym is their only personality trait. If you have ever punched a hole in a wall, you are the type of person I'm talking about... no doubt. This type of person is either at the highest of highs or lowest of lows, and being around them is always a gamble... they might only have 2 actual friends.

People who eat “healthy desserts” - Bro, stop putting granola on your ice cream... it doesn't make it any better, and granola tastes like drywall unless it's covered in chocolate with chocolate inside you already. Dessert is just different ways to put sugar into food and to charge way too much for it. Let me enjoy it without someone telling me how bad it is. This person is probably vegan, gluten free, and someone you need to stop talking too.

The guy who doesn’t know when too close is too close - Take a step back dude, I can hear you even if you're not stepping on my toes. This person’s breath probably stinks too, which just doubles the awfulness immediately. Every time this person engages in a conversation with you it's an instant “goddamnit” moment. This person probably talks way too long as well, and it makes you wonder how this person has any friends.

People from New Jersey - They are from New Jersey.

The guy who always lies about everything - This person is always lying no matter what the situation is. This guy shoots 2 under in a solo round, and once had a hole in one with no one around. It’s not even the big things that they lie about, it's things like what they had for breakfast... why would you lie, who cares? This person is also probably in a lot of drama because they are always lying and they just do not seem to learn. This person's brain works backwards, and they think that if they had a Toaster Strudel instead of a Pop-Tart, then their cat would like them more.

The guy who always has a buddy - “Oh you have cancer? Well I gotta buddy back home who has cancer.” Like bro, no one cares, shut up. They also have a buddy for everything that one can do in life. This person never calls their “buddies” by their actual name, it's just “I got a buddy who”... shut up.

The guy who takes everything personally - You ask this guy to clean up after himself and he hates you for a week, thinking that he is above you in the "roommate rank" that doesn’t actually exist. This guy can also be classified as the guy with anger problems, but he basically just has a stick up his ass at all times.

People who FaceTime in public - Bro, you can just call them and if you want them to see a picture, send them a picture. This person is a bad person.

People who disrespect their parents - Please don't be this type of person... especially to your mom. I have never met a mom who deserves to be disrespected by their own kid. This type of person could also be grouped under the anger problem person.

These next few are going to be rapid fire as I can’t think of examples you just got to know.

Car guys - Bro it's just a car.

Again, people who prefer FaceTime - If I wanted to see your face, I would see a picture or I would see you in person, FaceTime is just not it.

The weird Kid - Just be normal and don't talk to yourself while you eat and wear a fedora... and please shower at least once a week.

Whoever does not like Seinfeld - How can you hate it? It's a show about nothing.

“It’s not my fault” guy - If you say this more than twice a year about an issue, it turns out it is your fault. This could also be the takes everything personally guy.

People who do not read all of my blogs - Why not, I think they're funny and my dog does too. Hi Millie!!!

There will be no blog next week. The Deizzle needs to refuel, and with these gas prices it might take a while. Please follow me on Twitter @TheDeizzle for more content and updates on the blog.

Remember to say thank you if someone holds a door open for you... even if they have anger problems, and still have drywall on their hand from their latest hole punch.